Originally Posted by kowalski

... what interests me is some of the same guys who were saying don't mess with married women on [one] thread recently are encouraging SJ to get into a girl with a boyfriend. Seriously!

Morally I don't see the difference.

Originally Posted by Summer Junky

I think there is a difference, depending on how much you value marriage I suppose. People get into relationships knowing full well that they're not intending to spend the rest of their lives together. When you get married that's the deal.

That's not to say that I don't agree with what your'e saying Kowalski, cos actually I do. If as she says they have a good thing going on and they do love each other, I can assure you I would not go any where near that. Unfortunately for me I have a conscience.

Originally Posted by kowalski

SJ, everything ends. Finity does not mean reduced value.

Morally you have two people who have made an agreement of exclusivity. Whether they intend permanence, which is something they can't have irrespective of their intention, or not is immaterial.

Say I'm in contract with Sky TV for a year and with BT for life. Is there any difference if I breach both contracts?

Originally Posted by legend

Let me explain my position ... I too don't have the intention of making out wit a girl in a relationship. When I say back burner, I meant to say in a 'friendly' kinda way. I don't see anything wrong with that. The friendly weekly text of saying hello or hanging out now and again for a coffee and a chat. I have a very special hot friend who is happily married and now heavily pregnant. We have lunch together everyday. I remember approaching her 1 lunch time last year. We chatted for 1 hr. She gave me her number altho she told me she is married. Nothing else gonna happen whilst she's married, we just enjoy each other's company...!

Originally Posted by Hustler25

I guess for me it depends on your intentions, if you know a girl is married/in a serious relationship and all you want to do is fuck her and then forget her for me that is wrong. Because your brief selfish act can be potentially destructive having long-term implications on the girl and indirectly on the guy she's with.

However I think if you genuinely like the girl and you seek a longer term investment with her and if you feel/know she likes you back then I find that more understandable to pursue. Think about it, many relationships become routine and stale after a while, the spark has gone and their relationship merely exists rather than living it to the full. That is sad. By perhaps getting involved with her whilst being mindful and respectful of her own moral dilemma allowing her to become accustomed and associated with you at her own pace is the possibly the best way to handle it.

There is no pleasant way to end a relationship. However your involvment in ending a relationship between two people could be the catalyst to allow both the girl and guy in the previous relationship to move on to better and more satisfying things. Chances are they may look back at your act and say 'That was for the best'.

We all know and see girls in relationships they are not satisfied with, they may feel compelled to stay in an unfulfilling relationship due to moral, cultural obligations or simply because there are no other offers on the table. Instead they bumble through life with blinkers on, disatisfied and repress urges and desires.

I feel sad for people in that situation. Surely as men of value we should be rescuing such damsels in distress, awakening them from their sad existence and allowing them to experience a more satisfying chapter in their lives within our reality! This is a benevolent act. If they guy has been such a chode to have not pleased his girl (or even attempted to) then he only really has himself to blame.

Say if you took a job offer in a high profile position, worked one week then another job opportunity came up which you felt was more suited to you and more satisfying. Would you take it? Bearing in mind the company that just hired you has spent time money and resources selecting you as the ideal candidate, rejecting many other potential recruits, they also have a long term vision for you in mind. You now also have contractual obligations. The sudden other job offer would be your dream job? You know you would love to do that job.

If you feel life is too short and your own satisfaction and well-being is important to you, then you will likely hand in your notice in a heart-beat. If you become too concerned about how your employer will react and the potential mess you could leave then you will probably let a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity pass you by.

Originally Posted by Hustler25

Without wishing to sound too flipant about the moral issues in question, now I think just think 'fair enough' if she's game. In this community you hear things like 'Be the man who takes what he wants' banded about, if a guy is doing just that then good luck to him I say.