Warning this is likely to be a bit of an essay as I got a lot of things to spill out and try and get my head my round with this field report, almost to a point where I was tempted not too write it, but here goes.

So went out for a friends birthday last weekend, was in a good mood everything going sweet till we went to a pretty rough bar (in my local town, not Notts where I'm used to going out). Anyway state plummeted after few lame situational chit chats and a lack of nice girls, decided to take action to change it, my technique for this is to go for a cigarette alone and start talking to people outside, tried the "who would win in a fight" opener, with a girl I wasn't facing directly, said it weakly and got possibly the bitchiest tone of "what, why? we wouldn't fight anyway" then walked off, didn't help my mood.

Twenty minutes later went outside again opened a three set with "Hey I'm * my name*" handshake. I find I'm so comfortable doing this now, that its almost pointless trying other openers as this consistently gets me into set to a point where girls comment on how I say it like I'm someone they should want to know. The girls weren't really hot, but chatted some nonsense to them a for a while, which brought me up a lot.

Decided to move venue with some friends and this changed my mood completely (in a good way), bumped into a few girls I know and flirted a bit, kissed some randoms then saw an old flame that I got with about 2 years ago and really liked at the time.

This is where my current headfuck is coming from. I was super direct with her and because it was really comfortable and I spent a good few hours with her dancing, chatting and kissing I busted pretty much a repertoire of things I've been wanting to try out, come across or used recently along with general chat, but to name a few I used thumbwars, jokey palm reading, loadsa cocky funny stuff, push pull throughout, kept an immaculate frame as she kept testing with things like "you think your so cool don't you?" to which I was like "fuck yeah I'm awesome", basically was about twice the man I was last time I got with her two years ago, I think it helped a lot that I actually really fancy her a lot.

Anyway could've pushed for a full close but would've had to really push due to logistical issues I won't go into, didn't happen anyway, kicked myself afterwards.

If you still reading this is were I would like some opinion, she txt and fb messaged me wanting to meet again and I want to a lot, almost too much. The problem is that I'm not based in my home town, I come back to visit but would never want to fully locate here again and won't be able to meet her till again for a month. If circumstances were different I think I would want a relationship with her and am sure she definitely wants the same. What I'm trying to figure out is if this is just a case of early skill development oneitis or I should make moves to pursue it. The last time we got together for about two weeks was before I started Uni and I felt the same then, let her go and she got into LTR with a guy until last week.

My heads a bit of a mess trying to work it out, as out of the 100+ girls I've met in the last few years, it's easily the best connection/feeling I've had with girl and it's unlikely she's going stay available for a long time (I haven't been in a relationship for a long time which probably contributes to it). Also I feel almost guilty about building such an awesome connection and then having to just let it go when it's quite obvious we both want more. Does anyone else ever get this? The other side of me is saying I want to work on my game and have relationships which are of a better situational convenience and I might find someone better. I think I'll wait till next month when I'm back again and hang out with her some and see where it goes, but to be honest I feel like if I do I'm either gonna mess her about or screw my head up with bizarre emotions even more, it's fucked already as I can't stop thinking about her. Thoughts, opinions and abuse welcome

Elaborate?
You were a chode she sucked you in and then spit you out ?

So are you in fear of being sucked back in and spat back out?
or do you want to continue your development in social awesomeness and not get 'tied' down so early on-- but conversely you are worried that you wont meet somone like her again?

Either way the answer is to live in the moment... arrange another meetup but continue your adventures in social awesomeness
this will have a dual effect-- with abundance you will give less of a shit about her -she will want you more and you will be less likely to get oneitis.

simple really

I was slightly more chodey, but it's definitely the latter and I pretty much fucked her off as I was about to go to Uni for freshers week and was buzzing with confidence and couldn't justify to myself moving across the country and starting a long distance relationship that had been going for two weeks.

I think I have a few viable options

- One. I go for it with her, go through a lot of shit to make it work, which it might not anyway and think fuck it, it's what I want but this will probably cut short my current adventures and development and put me in a long distance relationship for long periods, but means I wont risk losing out on her.

- Two. keep it cool and try and make it a convenient friend that I get with when I'm at home and we're both single. This will probably not last long though as she's hot and female, living in a fairly boring town and likely to get in a relationship with someone else while I'm gone. Also feelings confuse the hell out of this on both sides, but that might change.

- Three. Write it off completely and move on, out of sight out mind blah blah.

This is thing about this community - it's like you're not allowed to have a relationship with someone unless you get one-itis!
Fuck it...If you like the girl and you have a strong connection then why not give it a try? See where it goes...
I don't think its worth passing an opportunity to develop other skill sets that are equally as important like creating and sustaining a meaningful relationships with hot girls for when/if we meet "the one".
Being as though you live in separate towns there is nothing to stop you from still sarging in notts when you are not seeing her and this will probably stop you from being clingy/claustraphobic and just because you are sarging doesn't meant you have to escalate too far unless you want to. Ultimately you could go for the much coverted MLTR (it would be great to have one for each day of the week wouldn't it!) if that’s you’re thing
I don't think there is too much of a rush either - you say that she has only just finished her previous LTR. If she lives in a small town I don't think there is gonna be too many swarve characters there to sweep her off her feet (especially one as smooth as you! heheh!) You've already confirmed that she likes you too so she ain't gonna go gallavanting off with any old tom dick or harry!
Hope this helps mate.

I agree with Refl3x.

Why does it have to be so black & white? Why not go for the best of both worlds?
Does she want you to be committed to her? Has she asked you to move back to town in order to have a LTR?

Go and have fun with the girl! She obviously digs you, so go out with her. Kiss her. Fuck her. And if she starts asking for the above (or at least indicating that it's what she wants), explain that you cant, but that you wanna carry on having fun with her.

Long distance doesn't work, unless it's an entirely casual and open relationship.

Hope this helps dude.

Much love,

Craigus

Or before you fuck her, tell her you not looking for a long term relationship and happy to have a bit of fun. If she is as nice as you have described her, she deserves your honesty, rather being lead into the golden path.

I think that you should DEFINITELY NOT get in a relationship with her right now, due to her only being single a week. Makes you the rebound guy in my opinion..

Also, if you have been completely honest with her and open about everything, and not led her on and promised her the world, then if she gets too clingy or needy, thats not your problem

But if you can fuck her whilst you're both single, and stay friends, then boom, you've got a super hot fuck buddy whenever you're in town :P

Oh and I was watching "How I met your mother" last night, and it was about being on the hook. You can keep her on the hook, waiting for you, by saying stuff like, "I don't think we're ready for a relationship - RIGHT NOW". Keep her hooked

Thanks for the advice guys, I think I knew the answer deep down, but putting it out there helped get my head around it and not make any stupid needy moves. Anyway have arranged to meet again when I'm back and I'll just see where it goes from there.