Wassup ppl cbg here and I really need some advice on this problem I'm having. Even though it's got noting to do with my game (which by the way is going pretty well, I am currently having so much fun it's unreal) it's really bothering me.

My problem is with the ultimate amog, my big brother (he's 21, I'm 18). Just a quick back story our relationship has never been great (not terrible but more tolerance than love). I think he's quite insecure because almost every waking minute he constantly talks about me in a very negative way almost as if too feel good about himself. He'll tell my mum and sister how useless i am, how I'm messy and untidy, how I contribute nothing to this family etc and whatever else he can think of (which by the way is all bullshit trust me). But worst of all he loves to argue in public, which is something i hate (i personally think what happens at home stays at home). So here's my problem, before i got into the game I use to argue back an forth whenever he randomly started criticising me, But now after reading about inner game and it's teachings of being able to rise above negativity and be the type of person who is unaffected by negative people and whatever they have to say about you. I have began trying to be the type of person they talk about.

But ever since I started to try and ignore all his bitchy comments and snide remarks they just seem to have intensified, and now he analyses absolutely everything i do looking for some way to put me down. Even though I try so hard to ignore him, I just cant seem to rise above it and end up getting sucked in to having a pointless argument.

I seriously dont know what to do any more, I cant just move away from him because we live in the same house and i know your probably thinking just ignore him but it feels like whenever you show disinterest to a girl; they just want your attention more and more, so now he talks about me almost constantly. Any advice or feedback would be greatly appreciated.

Punch him in the face.

That one gesture will epitomize million words.

lol trust me I tried that many times, I don't mind fighting him infact we use to do it all the time. The problem is it doesn't solve anything but most importantly it puts a massive strain on my mum who already has high blood pressure. So I kinda need a non violent solution to this problem.

Bang his mum? Oh wait..

Bang his girlfriend/fuck buddy/best female friend
Intellectually outsmart him at everything on every level
Everytime he says something, think of a comeback. If you can't think of one, just stare at him blankly. Or just act like he doesn't exist. Like literally, act like he isn't even in the same house.

Alternatively. Play dirty. Practical jokes. Glue his phone to the table. Put itching powder in his underwear. If you wana go extreme, put laxatives in his cup of tea you make him.. then when he is on the shitter, shout in to him "Seems you have a big problem there bro, hope it wasn't from the tea I made you"

He wants to get you mad and he does.

You were right to try not to get annoyed by it. Try again.

You are re-training him. At first the bad behaviour will intensify. Eventually he'll decide this is now an expenditure of energy that is no longer effective and will change.


You can talk to him too. Tell him you think it's all silly and that there are real things going on in the world and that all people inevitably die and life is stressful and we all have problems without adding to that with unnecessary conflict at home and you don't want to argue any more and you might sometimes break but that you are going to keep trying (or whatever your motivations).


Peace,

kowalski

Its a phase.

I had to do this with a friend who I work with every day (and see most weekends).

I ignored. He intensifed. I ignored. He intensified more. I ignored. He got bored.

As these lot said man - keep ignoring it, walk away if you need to, just don't react to it. It will be tough, but on the flip side think that you must be definitely doing something positive with your life to be getting all this hate. Hopefully he will soon see sense and want to talk to you in a more constructive manner.

Everytime he says something about you reply with this "i agree with you 100%, thank you ever so much for pointing it out to me"..... even if you dont agree.

I wouldnt ignore him completely like some may advise, enless it really doesnt affect you. But its obvious it gets to you. The worst advice they give to kids in school who are bullied is to just ignore it and eventually it will stop. Even though this method will eventually work it doesnt stop the negative emotions eating away at the person inside. By reacting in a smart non violent way it will give you a feeling of rising above the other person and will make you feel in complete control, you do have to defend yourself.

AJay

Also known as the 'I know you are, you said you are, but what am I?' retort. This is still rising to it, which is the antagonist's desired outcome, just in an extremely childish way. So you would still be playing his game and losing.

This isn't school, it is family. Different.

As an adult - refuse to battle with your loved ones, don't add to the negativity. Speak honestly and move yourself out of any situation before it escalates (permanently if necessary). Decide you don't love someone before battling them, the opposite is insane.


Peace,

kowalski