I'm going to try and not write an essay here. Please read it all.

Anyway here's how it started. Went out one night with a mate we met these 2 girls, I told the one that was interested in me I had a girlfriend and she said good because I have a boyfriend. The girls invited me and my friend back to watch a film, my friend asked if I could go with him and just keep the other one company, I thought sure no harm caused (girlfriend actually said I could wingman) so we went back watched a film. The girl he was with offered to take him home and the one I was talking to offered to take me home. At this point in time I was fairly intoxicated. I said sure no problem as me and my friend go in different directions plus she knew I had a girlfriend and I knew she had a boyfriend. Anyway so im waiting for her to get her keys and she comes in and me being slouched on the sofa practically nearly passing out she decides to pull my trousers down. I being drunk was a bit confused, she then put a condom on my flat non erect penis. Just as she was about to try and sit on me I pushed her off and swiftly left, I never even kissed her.

That same night I end up going straight to my girlfriend in a bit of a state saying "I cheated" she was like its over. Fair enough if I actually had sex with the girl I would understand. The next day I sent flowers, we also spoke the same day (she cried told me she loves me) and I told her exactly what happened that I never had intercourse. She said she would think about it and let me her decision a few days later. The day after that we spoke on the phone (she cried told me she loves me again). The next day because of how well I know her family I went and apologised to her Dad for the trouble I caused and he knew what happened and he was cool about it said he was glad I showed up (I did it to social proof myself as I know she told her family what happened) so we spoke on the phone that day same stuff again.

I asked a female friend for advice and told her that I would be seeing my ex a few days later. She said make a scrap book put pictures and what I was thinking at the time about our dates, the first night we met etc. So I met up with her and the conclusion from it is we didn't get back together. She said she loves me but she doesn't think the time is right and she said she doesn't want to give me false hope but she said you never know one day. I said to her I don't just want to be friends that I want to be together. She said she still wants me in her life and I said well i'm going to delete your number and remove you off facebook (basically break all links) and then she got upset and said she does not want that to happen (sign of weakness??)

I think she may still be angry about me putting myself in that situation and she seems convinced its not the right time and she still thinks about it. She said she would look at this moment in 3 years time and regret it she also said if she can see her self with anyone its me. She clearly still likes me and I've done most of what I can do to evoke certain feelings. In general all my other friends girls and guys in my social crowd think she overreacted a bit and is stupid.

My plan of action is a Freeze Out simply because we only lost contact for one day and she said she nearly cried (we spoke everyday on the phone when we were together). Make sure my facebook is updated regularly with loads of pictures as she still wants to see it (i think she will check it everyday) and with my 6 pack guaranteed for April update regular with gym photos.

Whats your advice peoples on how I could Get Her Back? or how she is feeling? Is it hopeless? and yes I do have oneitis as we have been through a lot and she accepts things about my past that no other girl would, I also went kind of AFC. Also in terms of a timeframe asap as we had a routine of seeing eachother every friday without fail and I don't want her to get out the habit sort of thing.

NT

this question for me has one answer always, u cant. if she is comin back to you... its wihtout any trying on ur part.

the more u chase the further away it gets

Then why did you tell your girl friend you cheated? Cause you didn't someone tried it on with you and you rejected them!

ye i dont get this!!!! r u sure that what u say happened is what happened...

coz it feels a little weird to me!

I went all AFC started crying and shit and was in a state. So just said the first crap that came out my mouth. Which made it sound worse.

NT

i dont think AFC is a guy who has a GF & has girls trying to rape them!

u mean u went soft

Do you think I should freeze her out?

dude if you love this girl do you seriously think games like freezing her out will work?

Man up, take control, be assertive, go round with a bunch of flowers and say something to the effect of:

"look I fucked up, I was pissed and [insert true story here happened].
Yeah I shouldn't have been in that situation but i stopped it before anything happened.
I love you and want to be with you, I don't want to be your friend so its a relationship or we go our own separate ways.
Do you still love me and do you still want to be with me?"

Then back it up with actions. if she needs time give it too her but don't let her push you around, and if she needs time then give it to her, don't be asking about "the situation" until she's ready to talk to you about it, even then, just leave her alone and let her chase you (remember she wants the space)

Then if she isn't willing to surcome to your will just walk away and don't waste your time.

ye go with this, then u know either way! no regrets.

dont call her for a few days, let her cool off... then do the above

Ok so I did all the above flowers etc. So I decided to call her up angry and stop being soft. It worked more in my favour. As I think she knew she couldn't control me and was more at risk of losing me. So she seemed nicer and I suggested doing something on the 28th and she said yes. I've noticed that if I play it as though she is at risk of losing me, she gets more worried and responds more to me.

NT